My Writer’s Forum Breakup

I have an on again, off again relationship with writer forums. Okay, one in particular that tends to drive me batty.

This previous week, I was having a marketing issue, which led to me asking a question on a very well known and frequently visited forum. I asked the question hoping to get some advice or maybe just hear what others do with in this particular situation. Because sometimes it is more beneficial to learn about what works for others rather than hearing what you should be doing. You can analyze things better that way.

So, I asked away. This was the first time I visited a forum in a long time. I am more of a lurker than anything else because commenting always leads to other comments on what I say. And I am very tender when it comes to writing advice. I know what works for me and what doesn’t. And I have come to the conclusion that confidence is a fragile thing that needs to be protected.

The end result wasn’t pretty. Some people were very helpful. Others chalked down my question to meaning that my books must not be doing A, B & C if X, Y, & Z is not occurring. Which…..I’m sorry, just isn’t the case. At all. What works one week in self-publishing could flounder the following. That’s just the nature of the business as I know it. So when the subject suddenly turned into what my books were about and what I was or wasn’t potentially doing right (which had nothing to do with the question I posed) I decided to leave the topic in the dust and not respond to anything anyone said. Which is sad because the topic actually got a fair bit of attention. I actually considered deleting it. And I’m still on the edge over that.

Anyway, I decided that visiting forums can do more harm than good. I am a continuous lurker, but now I don’t know for certain if I even want to do that. I asked another writer a while back and he had a similar experience. He went on the same forum to generally “share” something for the sake of sharing it. It turned into an open critique. Not appreciated by him. And I can totally and completely understand why.

So…for now, me and writing forums are on a bit of a break. Because my confidence needs some self-nurturing. Not tearing. 😛

Does anyone else have these types of experiences with writer forums???

2 thoughts on “My Writer’s Forum Breakup

  1. stacy wilson

    You wouldn’t believe how shitty things can get on parent forums. Mom’s can be straight up bitches. Sorry that happened to you. Don’t let it get you down.

    1. I totally and completely believe that the parent forums are brutal. I have friends who are mothers who go crazy when people condemn their parenting. It’s just such a hot issue as far as how to “properly” raise kids.
      Thank you, sweetie!

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